Maybe it's time to post an update here (finally).
I've been really, really busy with my life here, and frankly, I don't know if I can recount all the bliss moments, as well as the down moments, I've had these past few months. Only one month has passed, and I feel so MUCH has happened.
Wherever I'll be going from now on, is now up to the Father. I'll just be here trying to be the best that I can be.
I secretly long for the days where the words that I would type in an entry would just come so naturally. Alas, those days may be long gone (or just in hiatus). It's kinda hard to get super inspired in an internet cafe full of people, you know.
Nevertheless, I'll probably be posting something of great value to me soon. Yes, of great value. It may very well sum up everything that I've done that I haven't blogged about yet.
Valentine's Day is next week! Hehe. I've already planned out all the gifts I'll give to people. Hehehe. Sana ganun din ako ka OC sa studies ko, ngeks! Ang weird lang is I'll be in Sagada for AP 12 (GE ko) stuff on the 14th. Yeay! I'll be celebrating love with indigenous people! Yeah! So, the gifts may be given out during the 12th, 13th or the 14th (through another person...with love, parin naman, hehe)
UP Fair din next week (I can't go to LoveRage, hehe...kasi nga may Sagada stuff)
Also Kalai Week is the next week after that. (Wacky Day! Acoustic Night! Open House!). Hehe, I've already bought half of my attire for wacky day. I'm also excited for the open house. Finally, I get to see the "other" rooms (Yung rooms raw ng mga super vain jan. *ahemahem*). Also, you can see my room (B315) din! You'll get free barya, hehe. But, I'll be locking my closet up. Also, if I borrowed something from you and never returned it: then it's probably somewhere in my room! 
Also, my birthday's coming up! I'll be 18 already. Whoo. All I can think of are all the responsibilities I'll be inheriting. Man, am I nervous. But rest assured, I'll get over it.
BTW: The best birthday gift anyone special to me (who's not in close enough proximity to me) can give is: A call. Just a simple little call greeting me a happy birthday, and you'll make my day (or my year, for that matter) 
My heart is still very much in Davao City and I still think of all the people I care about there.When I come back, sana magkwentuhan naman tayo (ang rami kong makwento, haha!) I miss you guys! I'll always be praying for you.
I leave you now with my favorite beatitude (ganun ba spelling?)
"Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God"
Matthew 5:8
Finally an Update
You are my Breaking Dawn
(Note: This doesn't have anything to do with the book - at all).
Whenever I wake up, I always want to see your eyes staring and making holes in my own eyes. Today, your eyelids seem to protect your dreams. I take one last look at your closed eyes and move on to your lips, which curved and made a smile. I lean and place a light peck on them.
You had always been a dreamer and I knew better than to disturb you from your personal musings.
Outside, wisps of orange were fighting the black shroud of the Night for the rightful place on top of the sky. I decide to go outside.
The boy woke up early that day. He was a spectator, watching the battle of the breaking dawn unfold. The arrogant Dark went up against the noble Light. It was the most beautiful of battles yet the boy knew that this was only one of many in the waged war. Darkness will always battle light. Yet battles were rarely seen. The boy felt lucky to at least see part of one of those battles.
His soul was not conflicted and his passions were deceivingly simple during the dawn. The Light gave those who were lucky enough to see the battle what they wanted; which is to see a miracle unfold.
Although his soul was not conflicted, it burned of a passion only known to him as love. He carefully fondled his passion and perfected his method of management. He knew how to be calm and how to be passionate. His love was for only one girl – the dreamer. There were no promises made between them for the girl did not know of his passion. The only promises made were to him – he vowed that his passion will always be dedicated to the lovely dreamer. The boy had always surmised that the girl knew of his passions but did not tell him – she had a wild imagination, after all. He had always hoped that his guilty pleasures did not prove to be ludicrous.
His eyes sparkled – he knew something was going to happen. He felt a hand take his own hand. That was when he heard the most beautiful of sounds – the whisper of a dreamer.
“The miracle’s about to happen”
This morning, I am able to witness that same battle I saw many years ago. It was at dawn that I first felt the texture of your hands. It was at dawn that I knew my guilty pleasures were far from ludicrous. At dawn, promises were made and souls were connected by the passion only known to him as love.
Those spectacular battles of the breaking dawn I have witnessed had taught me how to fight for that passion. They taught me how to manage it while still enjoying it. For what comes from the passion is more beautiful than any spectacle or miracle that the Dark and the Light could give me.
Our love is like a constant battle of wills and spirit. Every day, we would enjoy our shared passions until we grow tired. Every day, we renew our spirit and enjoy our passions again. I fight for the dreamer and the dreamer fights for me. Knowing that makes me look forward to every day in my life because ever since that time you first held my hand, you had become my reason to renew my spirit every day.
I feel the familiar texture of the dreamer’s hand. There will be more miracles: the Light will taste victory once again and both of our spirits will be renewed.
You are my battle. You are my breaking dawn.
(Haven't written free-form for a while stuff like this for a while, hehe)
Midterms are over but Hell isn't...
...such is the reality most of us have to face. In one week, we will be having our Chemistry 16 second long exam. Four days after, we will be having our Math 17 fourth long exam. Just three days after that, us MBB guys will take the second MBB long exam.
We have less than one week to recover from all that drama...the all familiar "Goodbye, UP!" drama? Well, some things did turn out good, but some were expectedly...fairly bad. My first exam in Chem 16 was, erm, passing (well, I didn't study...serves me right). My Math midterms turned out to be WAY more than a one-digit score(which I have expected)...I passed because of a 5 point bonus...so, I got 61 percent. Pretty bad....if you have 22% of your grade as 3.00 and you need a 2.25 to, well, pass. Only hope I got is with the 33% (final exam) and the three remaining long exams. I didn't study very good for the MBB long exam too and I got...well, passing lang (62%).
Hahay, magstudy na nga ako. I got pretty effing lucky to just pass all those exams...lalo na yung Math midterms (I really thought wala ng hope). Pero I gave myself hope: my three more exams and a finals pa man. Sa Chem naman: eh, there are two more exams and a good enough record sa ChemLab at sa quizzes. Sa MBB: I recently found out my class standing - despite scoring a 3,00 sa exam, overall I got 2.00. I don't know how the heck that happened, but I'm not complaining.
So, right now: I'm stuck in a wager of death: kung di ko ma-1.50 or higher ang itong next Math LE, manlibre ako. Well, promises do nothing to motivate me, it's time to blackmail myself with real money (and probably a pizza or something).
Sa Chem naman, wala akong ka-wager...kasi ako lang ang nag-iisa sa course ko sa class ko (both lab and lec) - so, yeah! Pero, magtarung na ako. We have an unknown analysis pa sa Tuesday...hahay, life.
As for my GE's, my SocSci 3 is getting worse. Pinagalitan ako ng teacher namin because wala daw ako masyadong interest sa class (well, I sleep but I'm generally interested)...she even subtly suggested me to drop (Not even considering it). Oh, well...my first scolding in UP...damn. Akala ko it'll be from my Math teacher....hahay. My CW 10 is doing okay, I guess....but what REALLY sucks is that I can never get my execise scores above the score of 17 (As in 4 out of 6 my exercises are actually 17/20). Not that having a 1.50 sucks (not really) but...come on, can't I just get an 18 for once? Ang score ng 18 is now my creative asymptote...someday, makamit din kita 18!
Red alert daw ang Manila ngayon? That's what my aunt and my cousin told me. Well, I didn't know (I don't watch television anymore). Pinapagbawalan na ako mag-malling. Ngek, like I'll go to any malls with these many tests in the future...
My hair is starting to annoy me. Uh, yeah...excuse me, my LONG hair is starting to annoy me. It takes a lot of time to comb my hair na. I guess I'm still not used to hair this long - but sana I can hold out until the end of the first year.
The only good thing about my situation is that I could turn it into a win-win situation. Say na makapasa man ako sa course na ito, I can start anew next sem (di cumulative ang grades, yehey) and finally have good enough grades. Or kung di ko man mapasa ito, I can have a new course, say that it's just the adjustment period (para may scholarship parin, lol) and start anew....plus may bit of an advantage siguro...bit lang...kasi kung mag Bio ako - naka Chem 16 na kasi ako (haha!).
Drabble...drabble...drabble. Wala na akong maisulat. Gusto ko sanang magsulat about love life pero zero naman, eh (Wow, first time in a long time!)
Cryptic (Re-Tooled
Abraham Bitoy Exercise Number 7
CW 10 Similes and Metaphors
It has always been raining here ever since I first came to Manila.
I look outside a window of the cafe. People are walking frantically to destinations I could care less about. Every now and then, cold stares would meet my own warm unexpecting eyes. Their eyes are enemy soldiers making bullet holes through the cafe window. I have no weapon against their merciless machine gun-wielding eyes. Nothing could protect me from the rain of poisonous and piercing stares.
I turn my attention back to my table. For months, I felt like a fish out of the Davao waters and into the land of Manila. Since I came here, I have waited for the time that I would grow legs.
You have finished eating your lunch and you come back from the water fountain holding a glass half-filled with water. You take a seat facing me, smiling as you do it.
You smile as you do it. It is something you rarely do nowadays. You hide it in your chest under the ocean. Yet, when I don a snorkel and an oxygen tank and manage to open that chest, I would sigh and put it back. I know I do not deserve something like that. There is a reason you lock it in a chest hidden from undeserving eyes and faulty logic: you only give it to people who deserve it.
The people who have seen you smile weave a tragic tale of hearts sinking when they see it. It is like an unbreakable code: an algorithm within an algorithm, they say. It will baffle even the most brilliant cryptologists. They say they spend a lot of time trying to solve the mystery behind your smile; what did it mean? There is no way that you smile because you are happy because your smile is a military tactic: a simple flashbang used to blind the enemy.
I want to say that I believe them. I have always confirmed what they were saying: you always smiled a smile worthy to be put on the mouths of master manipulators and gentlemen criminals. It always has some sort of demented motive behind the action. I pride myself on being one of the few who could see your motive. You are like a child playing with many yo-yo’s: when you see that one of them doesn’t come back, you will cut the string. Your smile is the foreshadowing before the tragedy of a yo-yo string being cut.
This time around, I could not see any playful motive. I could only feel uncharacteristic warmth and an aura of protection. It is an umbrella shielding me from bullet-sized raindrops from the outside of the cafe. You smile as you talk and I try to make out coherent responses: “Yeah sure”, “Uh-huh”, “I guess so”. I am more intrigued and baffled on why you suddenly gave me the password to the secret behind your cryptic smile.
At that instant, I knew it: your eyes have given me the key to your treasure chest. I do not need to solve the algorithm because you feel I deserve to see your treasure. Your smile is proof of evolution; it gave this fish some legs to walk on land. Darwin would have been proud.
It is a scroll that is said to hold all your secrets. Many men have received that scroll and were disappointed upon finding out the scroll held no secrets at all. I open it today and I see what the other men saw: a tiny speck of handwriting in the middle: “Know me”. It does not take me one minute to know what that means.
I confess being intimated by the mystery behind it and trying to know what it really means. Your smile today is the simple answer to a complicated problem: proof of Occam ’s razor. Your smile today is like finishing a book of your history in one second. It only took an instant for me to know what I have to do. It is the bridge between us, so I could reach your fortress where you keep the rest of yourself hidden and safe.
You smile yet again. This time, I smile back. Thank you for letting me in.
*Apparently I needed 10 similes/metaphors. :)
Cryptic (CW 10 - again!)
It has always been raining here ever since I first came to Manila. Had I not known that the precipitation from the Manila sky is tainted with pollution, I would not mind having my skin soaked with rain. I try to stay away from the rain as much as much as my will permits me to.
I look outside a window of the cafe. People are walking frantically to destinations I could care less about. Every now and then, cold stares would meet my own warm unexpecting eyes. Their eyes are enemy soldiers making bullet holes through the cafe window. I have no weapon against their merciless machine gun-wielding eyes. Nothing could protect me from the rain of poisonous and piercing stares.
I turn my attention back to my table. For months, I felt like a fish out of the Davao waters and into the land of Manila. Since I came here, I have waited for the time that I would grow legs.
You have finished eating your lunch and you come back from the water fountain holding a glass half-filled with water. You take a seat facing me, smiling as you do it.
You smile as you do it. It is something you rarely do nowadays. You hide it in your chest under the ocean. Yet, when I don a snorkel and an oxygen tank and manage to open that chest, I would sigh and put it back. I know I do not deserve something like that. There is a reason you lock it in a chest hidden from undeserving eyes and faulty logic: you only give it to people who deserve it.
The people who have seen you smile weave a tragic tale of hearts sinking when they see it. It is like an unbreakable code: an algorithm within an algorithm, they say. It will baffle even the most brilliant cryptologists. They say they spend a lot of time trying to solve the mystery behind your smile; what did it mean? There is no way that you smile because you are happy because your smile is a military tactic: a simple flashbang used to blind the enemy.
I want to say that I believe them. I have always confirmed what they were saying: you always smiled a smile worthy to be put on the mouths of master manipulators and gentlemen criminals. It always has some sort of demented motive behind the action. I pride myself on being one of the few who could see your motive. You are like a child playing with many yo-yo’s: when you see that one of them doesn’t come back, you will cut the string.
This time around, I could not see any playful motive. I could only feel uncharacteristic warmth and an aura of protection. It is an umbrella shielding me from bullet-sized raindrops from the outside of the cafe. You smile as you talk and I try to make out coherent responses: “Yeah sure”, “Uh-huh”, “I guess so”. I am more intrigued and baffled on why you suddenly gave me the password to the secret behind your cryptic smile.
At that instant, I knew it: your eyes have given me the key to your treasure chest. I do not need to solve the algorithm because you feel I deserve to see your smile. Your smile gave this fish some legs to walk on land. You built a bridge between us, so I could reach your fortress.
You smile yet again. This time, I smile back. Thank you for letting me in.
*Yes, it is about a smile again. I'm a sucker for this girl's smile.*I haven't passed this yet. I posted it just for me to see if it's good on both paper and blog(haha).
*Comments are okay, I guess.
*Clearly, I've been reading Digital Fortress. :).
A Slave to a Smile
What makes me like a girl? Actually the answer is quite simple: the girl has to INTRIGUE me. If my notice my interest for that girl never wanes, then I conclude that I really like that girl. I'm a simple guy, really...and I'm fairly easy to read. If I'm interested in a girl, I'd probably make her realize that. Interest is a simple thing for me since I never really talk to anyone who I'm not interested with. Captivating eyes and slender curves do nothing if I'm not interested.
What I hate is, sometimes, that interest is sometimes not captured by a pleasing personality or a great background and intellect. It's frustrating to know that I'm captivated by such a simple thing: a thing that's usually either ignored or misinterpreted.
A smile.
Why a smile? If I wanted to see a smile, I would just...look at myself in the mirror. Why do I fall for such a simple thing as this?
Simply put: If a girl that doesn't smile much suddenly does, it's a special thing. An occasion worthy of the best metaphors and poetry. I am a person who wants everyone around me to be happy, and a beautiful smile on a simple yet beautiful girl is my own personal masterpiece.
That is how I fall in love.
Well, since I've been here in UP, I've seen lots of girls smile (whether at me or not). I'm not just looking for a smile anymore because I want to fall in love with just one girl. I'm looking for THE smile.
I found it.
If you know who you are, keep smiling. Because I have been doing anything just to see your smile.
Because whenever I see your smile, I know it's going to be a good day.
